Imagine others are looking to you for inspiration...

Imagine others are looking to you for inspiration, and your next choice is going to influence theirs...

Neale Donald Walsch (author of the "Conversations With God" trilogy) is a remarkable spiritual BEing, as are we all. The only difference is he wears his spirituality on the outside. He cares. He shares. He inspires. He inspired me today to write this blog. Thank you Neale!

Remember in the movie, "It's a Wonderful Life," when George Bailey is shown by his guardian angel Clarence how life would have been without George's inspirational life, how Bedford Falls would have devolved into the dreaded Pottersville if he hadn't existed? This is not just the plot of a 1946 movie starring Jimmy Stewart, this is the actual plot of life, YOUR life. As much as you like to think you live an inconspicuous existence, unseen, unnoticed and unassuming, you are extremely visible to all you contact and to many whose lives you enter only obliquely.

EVERYTHING you think, say and do has enormous repercussions. When you consider the accretion of events throughout your lifetime, you have had a huge effect. Every thought you have is creative, whether conscious or uinconscious. Every statement you make has even more power, and finally your actions as the third and most powerful element of "thought, word and deed," actually change the course of the Universe. You build with every grain of sand. Each brick you lay adds to the monument of your influence.

Now that you have glimpsed the dynamic effect of your BEing, think for a minute how you have altered the lives and attitudes of others. When for instance, you stand up to a prevailing tradition that simply doesn't fit with "who you are," you not only end the tacit agreement that condoning in silence would promote, you also inspire others. Maybe someone in the circle felt the same way, and your courage inspired them to BEcome unafraid to express themselves too. Another possibility may be that during your daily travels you unknowingly come across a soul who is at the end of their rope. By spreading LOVE and happiness instead of FEAR and dread, you might make the difference, saving a life. Whatever you think, say and do, adds either to the Light, or the Darkness, there is no neutral, only positive or negative.

Take this knowledge then, and combine it with the above mentioned monument you have been building, and consider that each soul you come into contact with is also buidling their own monument! Your inspiration is multiplied by a factor of thousands...

Today, use the knowledge that everything you think, say or do is inspiring someone. You are either going to help them build their monument through your inspiration, or you are going to demolish what they have accomplished so far. Remember they are adding the bricks today, that will be their foundation years from now. Imagine others are looking to you for inspiration, for indeed your next choice is going to influence theirs...

Duffy

Tolerance is trusting that others know what is best for them...

Adopt an attitude of non-judgment. Tolerance is trusting that others know what is best for them...

"Look at all those young girls, with their bellies hanging out. What a disgrace!" says a woman with an equally protruding abdomen, simply one that is covered up. What is at work here? Two elements come to mind. The first is intolerance of what is socially acceptable. The second, is we dislike in others what we dislike in ourselves.

For the first part, we are culturalized from birth to conform to a set of standards. Each of us, however, has a different culturalizing experience, so these "standards" are actually OUR developed opinions. A child raised by immigrant parents for instance, is going to absorb some of the parents' native culture, which will be different than that of the children of natve born parents. Depending on your religion, geographic area, military or non-military background, how often you moved, your gender, economic class, birth order, and right down to who your friends were, etc., your version of what is socially acceptable is unique to you, although it is likely you imagine your "opinions" are held universally. Your Ego, needing to be important, aligns itself with groups it concludes are superior. As a member of the IN group, we imagine we will be endowed with this "superior" status. Derision and ridicule of non-members, the OUT group, is a way of showing allegiance to the IN group, and typically we continually re-state our allegiance in this fashion. This method is especially important to, and utilized by the members who show no other outward signs of membership. An example is when extremely poor, white racists, need to openly show bigotry, to separate themselves from the equally poor minority groups, of which they imagine themselves to be superior. This is all an illusion. We are all ONE, and our similarities far out weigh our differences.

The second part is conceptually difficult for some. One way of looking at this is when we see traits in others that we didn't like in ourselves, traits we have worked hard to fix or improve, we are irritated that the others in question have not done the hard work we have. The above quoted woman has tried to dress in a manner which hid her imagined flaws, and she is put off by those who apparently don't care to. Another example would be, the proverbial "reformed smoker." Quitting smoking is very hard work. Reformed smokers are very irked by those who those who continue smoking, apparently oblivious to the multitude of reasons that caused the reformer to quit. Another way this dislike manifests itself is as a method of self-preservation. There are parts of ourselves that we dislike, and we are afraid these disliked traits might come out. We police ourselves by openly commenting negatively, and then are forced to keep our own disliked traits supressed, so that we don't appear to be hypocrits. Ah, the games people play...

Since you are operating entirely from within the constructs of your own experience, your set of standards, are just that, YOUR set of standards. When operating in a group setting, YOU act as you believe the groups wants, all in an attempt to maintain membership. However, your set of standards, including the adopted standards of any group you are aligned with, are NOT universal, nor are they correct. They are what YOU have decided are correct. They don't apply to others. This is very difficult for most people to conceptualize, and even harder to accept...

Today, when you have a derisive or judgmental thought, stop and ask yourself why it is YOU believe you have the right to decide for others, what is in their best interest. It is said, "You don't see others as they are, you see them as you are." Acknowledge this and BEgin to allow and accept others as they are. Allow them the same liberty you have allowed yourself. BE tolerant. Tolerance is trusting that others know what is best for them...

Duffy

Seek to understand instead of being understood...

Seek to understand instead of being understood. Winning an argument is not as important as winning a heart...

Recently, I was asked in a Spiritual meeting, how to go about handling a contentious conversation, where one is being asked to do something unreasonable in a relationship. I answered, that as long as your Ego has you believing you are separate from the other, you will view things as win/lose from your perspective. I suggested coming from a place of ONEness, where the soul of one IS the soul of both, where no outcome that doesn't serve the best interest of both can be considered. Further I offered, "Seek first to understand, not be understood."

This advice runs counter to what we are indoctrinated to believe in our culture. Religion sells us redemption for good behavior or tithing. In the package come commandments, not the least of which is a moratorium on killing. I say moratorium, because the minute the entity is threatened, within which the religion has been allowed to prosper, the moratorium is lifted, and killing the perceived enemy is blessed. Every army in history has gone to war with God on their side...

Young men are taught, "Big boys don't cry." They are taught to offer their bodies for the good of the team in high school football. They are groomed as cannon fodder from birth. Pacifists are ostracized. We are taught to fight, fight, FIGHT!

Your Ego needs to be special. It will participate in ANY activity that garners "special" accolades. It sees itself as separate, and separate needs to be better as far as the Ego is concerned. It will align itself with any group whose membership raises its status. It will fight, kill and even die for this special status, and do anything including commit horrendous atrocities as long as it can maintain membership. Countries are run by the wealthiest citizens. They own and control the greatest accumulation of assets. So when countries decide to go to war, they say it is in "OUR" vital interests, but in reality it is in the interests of the controlling wealthy. But YOU desparately want to be a "member in good standing," so you agree to become cannon fodder.

In reality you were/are never alone. We are all ONE. We are all pieces of the universe. God is all things, and that means you are God. And so is the person with whom you are arguing. So are the people with whom your country is arguing.

We need to BEgin to reframe the debate. It must BEcome a conversation of deserving equals at ALL times. The central tenet must BEcome knowing WE are all ONE. You can't agrue with yourself. And shutting down your Ego shuts down the indoctrination. Ending the delusion that you are in any way separate from others and/or from God, ends your abitilty to: argue, fight or kill...

Today, notice whenever you feel superior to another. This is a clear sign that your Ego has separated you from them. It is a delusion. Instead imagine you are ONE and coming from the same place. Seek to understand instead of being understood...

Duffy

Peace, contentment and equanimity are the goals...

Peace, contentment and equanimity are the goals of and eventually the fruits of a spiritual life...A life worth living!

Most people can't stand to be with themselves. They need constant gratification to get through their day, contact, interaction, and distraction, and now that we have smart phones and social media of all types, we never actually have to be alone!

Gratification comes in two colors, we need to buy something, so our Ego can be gratified (temporarily), or we need a distraction (from ourselves). The buying/possessing strategy is the Ego's realm. The Ego needs to be important. It will look for any way possible be special. What happens when you buy something? You gain control over it, and your hoard of assets becomes larger. The more you accumulate, the more important and powerful you must be. People can't wait to show off their new stuff, because their Ego gets a hit every time they do! There is a reverse to this showing off too. Think of how many times people don't want to go to a function because they "have nothing to wear." They obviously have something to wear, they just might not have something new and impressive. Their Ego doesn't want to be subjected  to appearing less, less than special, less affluent, or less powerful than the others at the function. Ordinary is not the arena of the Ego. Also, when you make a purchase, your Ego imagines that certain qualities of the item are accrued to it, sophistication, taste, connections, and wherewithal, all irresistible.

As for distractions, they come in many shapes: activities, prejudices, hatreds, grudges, sports, gossip, mortification, victimhood, and the list goes on. Holding a grudge keeps your Ego occupied with anger and self. It uses up lots of emotion/time and keeps your Ego feeling superior. Predjudices are much the same. Gossip allows you to be special because YOU (temporarily) know something about someone else that other's don't. Victimhood, "POOR YOU!"

There are four major control dramas (James Redfield) used by your Ego for sucking energy out of others and thus accruing it:
1. The Intimidator - intimidates you until you cower. The cowered, lesser position gives energy and power to the intimidator.
2. The Inquisitor - askes an endless series of "gotcha" questions, until the you falter, then they jump in and say,"SEE!" garnering energy and power from your failure.
3. The Aloof - constantly backs up, causing you to keep stepping forward. They cause you to chase them which demonstrates their importance.
4. The Poor Me - who constantly complains and cries foul. When you comfort them, you give them your energy.

None of this is going to bring you one iota closer to peace and equanimity. In fact, it is keeping you from it. Equanimity is a state of balance. It needs nothing to happen. Gratification is the exact opposite. It is entirely unbalanced and based on need. As long as you continue on the path of gratification, you will need to keep seeking and searching for more, always MORE!

The way out of this is to gain control of your Ego. The only way to accomplish this is to BEgin to observe yourself. Observe what you say, what you do. There actually is a space between your thoughts. Try to stay in that gap as long as possible. Just BE still, silent. When a thought comes in don't pay it attention, just let it go by. Focus on your breathing. Eventually, with enough practice, you will be able to remain in that place of stillness, and you will BEgin to see LIFE in a new, undistracted way. You won't need to buy anything, or need to contact anyone, you won't need to DO anything, and your Ego won't be needed. You will BEgin to understand that you are a Human BEing, not a Human doing...

Today, simply try to watch yourself. Take a deep breath. Feel how wonderful it is simply to fill your lungs with air. Focus on your body. How do your hands feel? How do your legs feel touching the chair? Concentrate on the space between thoughts, where there are no thoughts. Peace, contentment and equanimity are the goals...

Duffy

Security is only in your mind...

Security is only in your mind. It is not something that can be accumulated "out there."

We are spiritual Beings having a human experience, and not the other way around. However, most of us have bought into the illusion of the other way around so deeply that we live in an almost constant state of fear. We are so afraid that we spend most of our time trying to set up defenses/barriers/protections to keep out calamity. None of this is possible. Consider the billionaire who goes to the doctor and learns he has stage four cancer and a week to live, or who gets lost flying solo from New York to Martha's Vineyard and crashes to his death. Where was the security? All of the planning and defenses, all of the hoarding and careful investment in barriers to misfortune were for naught. When it is time for your spiritual self to leave your human form behind, all of your imagined security is shown for what it always was, a placebo, a sugar pill, possibly self-administered therapy, but nothing more...

The only real security is in your attitude. You can decide to remove worry from your toolbag and remain present. You can decide to stop comparing the past to the imagined future and stay in the NOW. JOY follows. LOVE follows. Nothing can keep you from experiencing JOY and LOVE when you remain present. It is "The Power of Now" (Tolle).

Most people spend the majority (if not all) of their time either dredging up the past or worrying about the future. This leaves no time for what you are here for, a human experience. God is all things. This presents a problem. God being all things, can know this, but can't experience it. In order to experience something one must BE something other. This is explained wonderfully in the story for children,"The Candle in the Sun," by Eckhart Tolle. The essence is the candle can't tell it is bright because it is next to the sun. Only when it is next to darkness can it experience itself as bright. God, to solve this problem, sends a little piece of itself to take on human form, forgetting that it is God. The piece, YOU, can then actually experience God, and God can experience itself through you. The problem is that most people get here and make no attempt at experiencing God, they get completely immersed into the illusion, that they are something separate from God. Then feeling alone they experience FEAR. Fear causes them to plot and plan against adversity/hardship/catastrophe, seeking security. But there is no security. YOU are only here to experience the NOW, to be present. God is attempting to experience itself through you... right NOW.

Today, when you find yourself dredging up the past and re-examining all of the hurts and failures that you have stored as memories, stop... and come back to the present. There is nothing in your memories that God wants to experience. When you catch yourself worrying, awfulizing about the future, imagining scenarios where you might fail, STOP... You are missing the living. You are missing the JOY. You are missing the LOVE, for security is only in your mind...

Duffy

Pawns, are simply those controlled by the collective unconscious...

If you don't take charge of your life, you're a pawn of those who do (Pavlina). Pawns are simply those controlled by the collective unconscious...

What is the collective unconscious? Let's begin with what it's made of. The collective unconscious is comprised of thoughts, unconscious thoughts. Thoughts are nothing more than electrical impulses. All electrical impulses have a magnetic field around them. This field is sometimes referred to as lines of flux. This is simply physics. The magnetic field around an impulse is amplified when its lines of flux cross into the flux of another impulse, as long as they have the same polarity. If their polarity is opposite they cancel each other out to the degree of the strength of their individual fields. So thoughts attract like thoughts and repel unlike thoughts. Like thoughts gain power when they band together, as in, "Whenever two or more of you are gathered in my name..." This power actually creates movement of matter and energy. So, thoughts are creative...

Think about that. Your thoughts actually create. "What you think about, comes about..."

Now, how many of YOUR thoughts are unconscious, reflexive repeats of things you've heard, or that are based on your fears/hatreds/frustrations? When YOU tune in everyday to radio or TV, where the show is contrived to stir up those feelings, you are engaging in a creative act. YOUR thoughts, set in motion by the show's host have incredible power! But it is not you who is controlling them, it is the show's host!!! You're creating, but as a tool, a tool of someone else. You might as well be manure, used to fertilize hate.

Imagine when you drive by a group of "illegals." If you feel hatred for them you are adding to the lines of flux of every other person who goes by and hates them. This amplifies the hatred and given enough power, actually causes acts of hatred and atrocities against "illegals." When your thoughts and the thoughts of the other passersby get strong enough, when they become accepted enough to become words, the second level of creation, they have even more power. They have the power to create similar thoughts in others. Given enough attention, they will eventually become DEEDS, the third and most powerful of the acts of creation. Thought, word and deed...

What can you do about this? YOU can BEgin by controlling your own thoughts. It can take a long time to reach a state where you don't keep slipping back down into the place of unconsciousness, the states of apathy, grief, shame, guilt, hatred, anger, and frustration. Most people live their entire lives in this place, so don't berate yourself if you slip back to where it was once comfortable. When you are exposed to something that causes you to react negatively, try to simply pause before reacting, and get into the gap between your thoughts. Get into the gap and observe yourself. Notice that these feelings/thoughts don't really represent you. They are learned responses. Remind yourself, WE are ALL God's children, all equally pleasing and deserving. Stop yourself from simply mindlessly going along with the crowd. Decide WHO YOU REALLY ARE, and express that! Even the thoughts of only one person, in the opposite polarity of hatred, weakens it, weakens anger, weakens FEAR... BE Conscious! Create your own reality with YOUR thoughts. Stop being a pawn for the collective unconscious, that mindless mass of misdirected hate.

Today, observe yourself. Observe others. Notice how many times you hear things parroted back to you, prejudices, bigotry, hate. Resolve to change yourself. Simply doing that alone results in improving the world. YOUR thoughts have power, so aim them where you direct, not where you are directed...

Duffy

When you attempt to control others, you limit your possibilities...

When you attempt to control others, you keep them from surpassing YOUR abilities. You prevent them from creating something outside of YOUR imagination, and thus you limit YOUR possilbilities...

When you LOVE life, you know to allow and accept that whatever happens will be fine and normal. When you LOVE others you trust them. You give them the opportunity to be the best thay can be, to shine. When you do this they will surprise you, and you will be happy you did.

We have all been exposed to control freaks, bosses, parents, and friends, who can't seem to be happy letting you do and develop on your own. They constantly carp on your performance. They hover and smother, trying to force your round peg into THEIR square hole... Not only is this tiresome, but it is truly unproductive.

How often have you worked side by side with someone, sometimes for years, and then after being invited to their home for the first time, you are exposed to something they do or can do, that completely shatters the narrow-minded view you had of them? "I knew you played guitar, but I didn't think you played like that!" "I heard you did oil paintings, but these should be in a museum, they are awesome!" "You built that? All by yourself!" We box people in, in our minds, limiting what they can do, until suddenly, when our eyes are opened we are shaken, and we come to realize on some level at least, that by limiting them in our minds, we really put limits on ourselves, on our own imaginations.

God is ALL things. And so, all people are God. God is not limited, and neither are they. They are capable of amazing things, when you trust them to offer their best. We had a little celebration recently. People came from four states. Everyone was on a different schedule, wave-length and time frame. Now I could have decided to "guide" everyone with a firm hand and micro-managed every step of the way. By doing that I would have guaranteed that things got done MY way, and to the degree I could force my will on them, I would have been satisfied with the outcome. Instead I decided I would simply express how grateful I was for each one, and how thankful I was for their contribution. Some people cooked, some decorated, some served, some cleaned, some wrapped, some photographed, some helped greet and host, some took care of the music, some took care of the slide-show... Everyone knew what they were capable of, and was encouraged to find just the place they could add value and impact the whole, in their best and most persoanl way. Well, the whole thing went far better than anything "I" could have imagined! And it was all done and received with LOVE, no stress, no FEAR...

Today, give in to the Universe. Opt for allowing. Choose acceptance. Decide that those around you can accomplish great things, all on their own. Let go and let God, for when you CONROL everyone, you prevent them from creating something outside of YOUR imagination, and thus you limit YOUR possibilities...

Duffy